Saturday, August 27, 2005

Am I Going Bonkers?

This post like last week's post is about my thinking rather than any particular event, but some news first. A friend sent me a quote after last week's post that I liked so much I decided to put it on the blog. It is from former Israeli prime minister, Golda Meir, who said "Don't be humble. You're not that great."

My second bit of news is that during the week my physio said it was ok for me to get around places with predictable terrain like Cavit without my stick. She had a good look at my walk before she said that. One of my problems that will, hopefully, pass with time is that, occasionally, I try and transfer my weight on to the foot in the air before it is on the ground. That causes the foot to come down too early. My physio thinks that I should stop doing that in time, but, in the mean time, the stick should make me think about it more and be more useful when the terrain isn't flat or predictable.

The main reason for this post and the reason for the strange title is to tell you about what I am thinking what life will be like post-discharge. I have managed to avoid the common head injury patient desire to get back home earlier than is sensible. However, I don't seem to have avoided the common head injury patient belief that help won't be needed after discharge. I do accept that I will need some physiotherapy after I'm discharged, but it's sort of hard to ignore the issue when you have trouble walking. I don't, however, believe that I will need much more therapy like occupational therapy.

The issue has arisen recently in a meeting between me, my Mum, the clinical leader and the occupational therapist who is most likely to give me help (if I need it :-) after discharge. It has also been an issue in thinking about going away for a trip post-discharge.

This belief creates an interesting situation for me because I am aware that it is so common for head injury patients to believe what they believe despite the common need for help post-discharge. I spend a bit of time wondering if my thinking actually is irrational and if maybe I'm going bonkers.

Still, I might be right (hopefully) and my physio says the difference with me is that I'm willing to listen to what people have to say, but this doesn't stop me wondering if I might be thinking irrationally. How do you ever know if you're going crazy, I guess?

Cheers,
Mike

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Mike
It's probably a bit hard to predict what help is needed post-discharge, until you're there!? It sounds like you'e willing to accept help if you need it. You seem to be good at finding the balance between being determined enough to make good progress, but not too stubborn to reach for too much independence before you're ready. Must be a tough call sometimes! Thank you for your insights/thoughts over the last couple of blogs. Congrats. on the next step to losing the stick. (No pun intended).
Cheers to all
Carolyn Pomeroy et al.

Anonymous said...

Mike, you don't even want to know what my thinking is like, erratic and all over the place, yours is logical, wish I had half the insight that you have.
Gilda

Anonymous said...

Hey Mike, so is one going crazy? Well as they say it takes one to know one.. so in that case I hope bloody not!!!

Maybe it's a bit like the fine line when deciding if one is a genius or insane. :)

But mike, if you have all the info and advise, at the end of the day then only you know what is best for yourself.

Take it easy mate

Miles

Anonymous said...

Hey Mike,
Some incredible people have been called 'crazy'!
In some form or another, I think we all are in our own special way!!

Kent just said a few words in his sleep, sat up, then went back to sleep. Need i say more!!

I'm sure when the time comes you will know what you have to do in order to achieve your goals!

Congratulations on loosing the walking stick around Cavit! Awesome work! You'll be walking out the door unaided soon! What a fantastic step forward towards your discharge goal!

Thanks so much for spending time with us while we were in NZ! It was so much fun hanging out with you! Thank you.
Lots of Love,
Kent and Amanda ;)

Anonymous said...

Hi Mike

My apologies for not checking in a little more often with you in recent months - just reading over the blogs again, your progress is amazing - I just am lost for words and you know that's very difficult for me!

Best wishes and take care

Leah Marren

Anonymous said...

Hi Mike, Gerard here, Kylie's friend and ex-flattie and current Londoner...
Just wanted to say that your last message was a good insight into the thought process of someone in your situation - having worked (and currently doing so) with people who have head injuries it is nice to see. And I can assure you if you are contemplating the matter to that degree then you are not crazy. But working with OTs, I can see how they can make you doubt your sanity... regular occurance for me!
Gerard